This Week's Focus

I'm going to start something new.  Every Monday I will be typing a list of things that I want to focus on during the week.  This can be like a "to-do" list for the entire week.  I also want to start doing Food Waste Friday.  So check back on Friday for a *nasty* picture of my food waste-- and read more about 


November 8-14


In the area of cleanliness:

• Clean the kitchen
• Clean and decorate the kitchen table
• Clean my night stand area
• Finish up laundry
• Put away laundry

In the area of work:

• Make a backdrop for the 3rd grade program
• Go to the store for miscellaneous items
• Make soup for Friday's PLC

In the area taking care of the family (ie wifely duties):

• Pay the bills
• Go to the bank (to deposit the daycare check)
• Drop off my car at the Honda place
• Go Christmas Shopping
• Make a cake for Whit's birthday (on Tuesday)
• Wrap his presents

So there you have it.  Check back to see if any (hopefully all) is accomplished! 

Happy Birthday, McCoy!

Dear McCoy,
You came into this world one year ago but you entered my life much earlier than that.  The moment I found out you were growing as a part of me, I fell in love with you.  The moment I first saw your little body, which was the size of a piece of rice, my heart jumped for joy.  The first time I heard your speedy, little heartbeat, my heartbeat raced with excitement.  The first time I saw your profile, I was overcome with happiness.  When I found out you were a boy, my heart started to create that mother-son relationship.  The moment I first felt you kick, I felt your soul come to life.  And the first time I saw your beautiful face, my life started over.  I had a new purpose for living.  I had a new purpose for loving.

As I reflect on the last year, I want to take a snapshot of your personality and quirks.  I want to remember all the little details photography and video can't catch.  I want to hold on to my baby boy.

McCoy, you have bright red hair that seems to brighten every day.  It doesn't get lighter, it seems to get more red.  And to match your fire red hair is a feisty temper!  When you don't get your way, can't reach a toy, or we take something away from you, you throw your head back and scream with discontent.  "Give it back, NOW!!" you seem to scream.

One thing that makes you Mr. McCoy is your facial expressions.  Ever since Day 1, you have a very focused look about you-- taking it all in, questioning life's mysteries with your eyes.  Along with your squinting eyes, your eyebrows squish together in an inquisitive look.  I know you will constantly ask "Why?', "What if?", "How come?" and retain all of the answers.  Even a serious person laughs occasionally, but you have to really buy into what we are doing, or saying.  A simple tickle, peak-a-boo, or silly song won't make you giggle.  Smile, yes but you don't dare laugh.  You are much to sophisticated for that nonsense!  You mother and father try very hard, though.  And when you do let down your guard, you have such a great time!

After dinners, we have a bath.  No matter where you are in the house, we turn on the bath water and you come running to the tub!  You even try and hoist your legs over the sides to climb in!  Sometimes with all your clothes on still!  We get you undressed and you start to pat your naked belly like you are thanking us for the great meal.

You can blow kisses and give high fives.  You can speak Spanish (ha!) with this awesome gargle and rolling your tongue.  You can bear crawl with an amazing speed.  But you can walk as well.  You LOVE to be outside!  Your teachers at daycare say you get upset when other kids are outside playing and you are stuck inside.  Along with outside, comes dirt and rocks-- your other two favorite things.  You like to line up all the rocks on a ledge and drop them from up above.  You pick up leaves and twirl them between your thumb and pointer finger, making sure you are careful not to crunch them.  Boxes are a favorite toy as well as the pots and pans and your favorite cupboard-- Tubberware!!  Recently you have started to take out all the cookie sheets, muffin pans and cake pans and really enjoy making noise!  You also love to play the piano!  This makes your momma and papa very happy!  We love for you to come over and play piano for us while we are sitting in the living or working in the kitchen (except for when you insist on playing during Momma's piano lessons!).

You are an excellent eater!  You also nurse like a champ!  I can put any food in front of you and trust that you will at least try it.  Not very many times have you refused to eat something.  That is so wonderful, McCoy!  We don't like picky eaters, and you are FAR from that!

You absolutely hate getting your diaper changed, unless we change it other than the changing table.  You like to squirm around and twist your body so we put the diaper on crocked.  It makes for some screamy diaper changes!

McCoy, you have changed my life so much- more than I could have every dreamed.  I think about you every single minute of the day, especially when we are away from each other.  I have never spent a night away from you because I know I will miss you too much.  I love you with all of my heart.  I also love you with every part of my body, even my toes and fingers and eyelashes.  McCoy, Happy Birthday!  You are one!

breastfeeding for almost a year

I think I'm at that point where McCoy isn't getting what he needs from me.  It's been almost a year of breastfeeding.  I'm very proud of myself for doing it this long even though I've been getting some discouragement from a co-worker and embarrassment from my brother.  I want to share with you (really, so I can remember) some stories of breastfeeding and some feelings I have toward the beautiful gift I'm giving to my son.

I remember having a hard time getting McCoy to latch on at the hospital.  My mom was helping me trying to get him to latch on and after about five minutes, she asked "Is he on there?"  And I told her yes, he was sucking away.  But when I took him off, I noticed a hickey on my breast!!  He wasn't latched on at all, only to have been sucking on my skin!  After we got home, I only remember one night where McCoy was crying and crying and I couldn't figure out why he wasn't eating.  I even woke up Whit and had him come in there to talk me out of giving him a bottle with formula.  He was only about two or three weeks old.  Whit came in and helped me and he nursed just fine.  Other than that one night and the incident in the hospital, I think my McCoy is a wonderful nurser.  We really haven't had any problems with latching on.  He bit for a while-- maybe only a week or so.  But he stopped that pretty fast.  When he bites, he is not hungry and he's only playing. :)  Maybe just bored I guess.  I played on Facebook when I'm bored; McCoy bites his mother...  Weird child.

My favorite time of the day to nurse is in the morning.  After McCoy has been asleep for the night, he usually wakes up about 4:30.  I gladly greet him and scoop him up in my arms and we walk together to my bed.  He lays between Whit and I and I nurse him back to sleep.  I love this comfort.  I feel his body close to mine and I feel Whit's body close to his.  I know that we are all three safe.  I think that this time is more of a routine that we have set.  I know that he doesn't need this "food" from me now.  It's more of a together bonding time.  He is usually back to sleep in about 15 minutes.  I just love sleeping next to him.  Although I have to admit, I get much better sleep when he is not in our bed-- those mornings, though, they are just perfect for cuddling and nursing my sweet baby boy.  Especially if it is raining and dark outside-- that's the best!

I love his face when I'm getting ready to breastfeed him.  He usually scrunches up his nose and starts whimpering like a little puppy... hurry up, hurry up!  I love how his little fingers run up and down my arm and occasionally my belly.  He finds my belly button and sticks his fingers in there as he is concentrating on his task at hand.

My breastfeeding journey is about to end, I believe.  I don't want it to, and just as we were moving McCoy out of our room-- I just kept delaying the process.  I have a feeling I'll do the same thing with nursing.  So it might be when McCoy turns one, maybe later!

tired.

Mom time.

Please don't get me wrong.  I love being a mother.  I love being a mother to McCoy.  He is so sweet and so charming.  His little personality is starting to shine through and everyday he seems to learn more and is able to express himself better.  I love watching him explore the world around him and develop into such a little boy.

But I'm tired.  I'm tired because not only am I being a mother to McCoy, I'm also being a wife to Whit, a piano teacher to my students, a bell ringer with Rezound, and a music teacher to some 500 children.  When I get home, I'm exhausted.  I want to rest and relaxed.  But as nature calls, I can't.  I need to be at rehearsal.  I need to cook dinner.  I need to nurse my baby.  I need to teach piano.  I need to clean up the house.  

I love my life.  I don't want to change anything.  But I want to escape for only a day (or two!).  I know I could never do that for several reasons.  The first reason would be that it is unpractical.  McCoy is only 11 months old.  I can't leave my family.  The other reason is I have to continue with my obligations.  And the final reason is because even if I DID escape for a day or two, I wouldn't be able to relax.  I wouldn't be able to do what I wanted to do because I would worry all day and all night about my little baby boy.  

The thing is, even if I did come home and relax, the stuff would be waiting for me the next day and the next day and the next.  Then I would feel overwhelmed and behind and rushed. 

Thank you, dear reader for listening to me complain.  Again.

Time to get happy, Tenessa.   

high expectations are not always what they seem

I've learned a few things in the last couple of months.  The high expectations that I have for others are not always what I think they should be.  For example: hanging out with someone. I think in my mind that this experience is going to be great.  That it is going to be wonderful.  That my friendship and relationship with this person is going to strengthen and become more fulfilling.  And when the time comes; that person fails to deliver the way I think it ought to be.  This means that my perception on many relationships are oftentimes wrong or don't happen the way I think it will.

So what does this mean for me?  How should I stop this crazy let down in my life?  I guess I should start by not having any preconceived notions about another person.  I should let that person develop the way they are going to develop, instead of predicting how it will turn out.  I guess I should also judge less.

It's just hard when you count on or believe really strongly for someone and then they let you down.  Oh well.  I guess that relationship was not as strong as I was hoping.

Finally... some respect!

In the past, I have ALWAYS been blocked from writing my blog at school.  At the end of last year, I found a way to still update using the email way.

Finally, a new technology director was hired in the middle of the year last year and made some great changes for our district.  He really believes in doing blogs with students (I am most defiantly not there yet).  He told us that we are professionals and he trusts us on the internet.  And of course, they can always monitor the websites we visit-- alas, no Facebook still.  So, I clicked on some of my favorite websites that were blocked last year (tasteofhome.com, hotmail, youtube and blogger) and low and behold, they are open!  So, to the title of my post today, finally.. .some respect!

In other school news, scheduling is a beast sometimes.  I have had some trouble with the band director from Patton not being able to come to test the kids, AM/PM Kindergarten (mEsS!!) and just the general plan-being-taken-up-by-stupid-people routine.  It sucks, but it should be back to normal next week or so.

Programs... getting a great head start on them.  But I'm still stumped on backdrops.  Paint?  Fabric? Just can't figure it out.

Composting

I love to search new sites.  It seems like I spend countless hours on the internet seeking ways to become more frugal or eat more healthy or ways to use my endless supply of fresh veggies from the garden.  I came across this website yesterday The Frugal Girl and began to search her website.  It took me a while to search out all the different "stuff" on her website.  It looks like she is doing photography 365 too!  (Oh yeah, I've pretty much stopped because I don't have lightroom anymore... boo).  Anyways, I saw that she made a compost pile out of a Rubbermaid tote.  Well, I can do that!  So, in about 15 minutes, I made one!!

Here's what you need:
A drill
A drill bit (I had Whit put on the largest one he had)
A rubbermaid tote
A lid to the rubbermaid tote












Next you will need to drill holes in the top, sides and bottom.

Last, just place it where you want it.  I put ours in our garden where we didn't have any vegetables planted.  This way if it leaked, it would go right into the soil.